Those balls look pretty dangerous.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
