i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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