dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
