just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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