This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize