I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
