Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
