He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Randomize
