WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
