Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
