jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Randomize
