remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
