Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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