Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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