whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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