I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
