he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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