sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
