don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
