i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
