I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
