It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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