I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
