Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Randomize
