i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Randomize
