All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
