Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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