what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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