Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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