Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
