Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
