its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
