i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
