great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
