She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I supernannyed him into submission
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
