Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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