Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize