Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
