remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
