The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
