bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
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