His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
