So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
