so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
