look no pants
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
