So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
