i think my tv is drunk
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
