she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize