Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
