My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
there is puke in my bra ... again
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