My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize